http://blind-to-the-truth.blogspot.com/

Alive and Kicking

I checked my weapons, double checking to make sure that my dagger was still in it's hilt on my belt as we walked out of the cabin. In every spar I had ever had with Sagari I had never come anywhere close to beating her. I was never able to even land a scratch. As we reached the end of the path I looked back at Wolf to see her securing her mask. Behind her was Hart and Fell, who looked VERY unhappy.

"Are you ready?" she asked.

I laughed nervously, my voice catching a bit. "Not at all." I responded. I straightened my back, adopting a steely and more serious look. "Wolf you know there's a chance neither one of us will make it out of this fight alive. You don't have to do this."

“You’re wrong about that, dear. I’m not going to send you out on your own to die because you wouldn’t kill me”

"You remember what I told you though right? If things start to look bad you run."

“I know... I will”

She took my and Fell's hands, Hart rested his hand on her shoulder. Suddenly we found ourselves on a beaten path. I felt a light rain on my skin as I observed my surroundings. I found that we were on a path near the ocean, the waves crashing up onto the shore was heard from the distance. I could see a treeline that began a large forest. Hart dragged Fell further down the path with him. Wolf grabbed my wrist and she pulled me quickly towards the forest. Sagari, as expected, appeared.

"So I see that you decided to help out your psychotic 'Friend'" Sagari's voice portrayed her immense hatred. "A decision you will soon regret."

“Come on then little girl,” Wolf taunted her, removing her survival knife. “Don't be afraid! Come play with us in the forest!” Sagari darted into the forest disappearing into the trees.

"Come out, you damn coward!” My voice echoed throughout the forest. “Come out and face what's coming to you!"

"As you wish." She stepped out from behind one of the trees. Instantly I felt all of my rational self evaporate into my rage as I began to charge toward her, throwing a heavy right hook at Sagari's smug expression. Sagari's smirk widened as she grasped my arm swinging me over to the side and slamming me into one of the trees with a loud crack, pinning my arms down onto the rough bark. "Really you sparred me all the times and you thought that would work. You really are pathetic."

I furrowed my eyebrows as I glared at her, suddenly she relaxed her grip as a swift blur of silver slashed through the air from where she once was, Wolf stood a few paces away as we locked our eyes onto Sagari who was now standing a couple yards away, an arrogant smirk adorning her face. "Lovely, It will be fun to tear you both apart at the same time."

I then yanked out one of my smaller daggers, flicking my wrist quickly as the blade gave a small thud as it speared at the tree were Sagari once was, in a blur she was there. Smashing her fist into the left of my collar bone, the swiftness of the punch launching, me back into the tree. A red haze edged along my vision as pain lanced its way up throughout my arm. I gritted my teeth, holding back a shout as I steadied myself. I looked up to see Sagari drawing her rapier, blood running down her side. Wolf was on the ground struggling to stand.

“You ruin everything.” Sagari spat. I tried to take advantage of her distraction only to be bashed in the face with the pommel of her rapier.

While I was reeling She rushed forward and before I could react she slashed her sword blood spurting from my chest as an X formed. I couldn't stop myself from taking a knee. My vision began to blur as I struggled not to pass out. I stood breathing heavily. Wolf had managed to give Sagari a long cut across her stomach. I attacked Sagari leaped back before darting forward with a thrust her rapier pierced my torso. I fell to my knees clutching my stomach. My vision blurred, at this point I had lost a lot blood.

“You take everything from me!” I heard Sagari yell. Wolf was dodging around Sagari's sword as she tried to stab her. “My brother was fourteen when that thing you serve found us!” She snarled “It took his mind and made him kill our parents!” I saw Wolf manage to land a blow. Before being bashed in the head with Sagari's pommel. Sagari thrust her sword forward pinning Wolf to the tree.

I tried to get up. But found that I couldn't. I was barely conscious at this point.

“Do you know what happened after he killed my parents?” Sagari continued “He snapped out of it then and killed himself after he realized what he did!” I knew I had lost too much blood. The edge of my vision began to go black. I could barely make out what Sagari was saying. “All I have left is revenge. I won’t rest until your master and all of your kind is destroyed!”

She removed the sword from Wolf's shoulder and slammed her head into the tree. Wolf began to slide down the tree. I blearily made out Sagari raising her sword high ready to end Wolf's life.

You know how people say that when your about to die your life flashes before your eyes? I never thought that was true but at that moment it did.

My mother's body parts spread about her room, my father crying covered in blood....

Both my brothers running into the forest and never coming back.....

Sitting uselessly as Izzy was taken.....

The look of shock and fear on Nick's face as his throat was slit.........

Holding Izzy as the life left her eyes.....

"She had the most beautiful light green hair"

My entire life had only been failures. Everyone precious to me dying and I was always useless. SO FUCKING USELESS. It wouldn't happen again.

"You know I love you right?"

Never again.......

I jumped to my feet adrenaline flooding my veins. I rushed forward faster than should have been possible and planted my dagger into Sagari's back. Sagari turned a look of shock adorning her face. She thrust her sword forward but it was like she was moving in slow motion. I weaved around it and grabbed her wrist with a quick movement SNAP! She screamed dropping her sword and holding her now broken wrist. I walked over to Wolf as she stood up. We nodded to each other before both of us rushed Sagari she could do nothing as Wolf delivered a bone shattering punch to her ribs followed by me delivering a crushing kick to her solar plexus. She took a half ass swing at me but I easily batted away the clumsy attempt before punching her in the face shattering her nose.

With a scream of rage Sagari lunged at Wolf who simply side stepped and kneed her knocking the wind out of her. As Sagari quickly turned Wolf stomped on her knee cap a sickening crack filled the air as Sagari screamed and fell. Wolf stood over her ready to end it.

"You don't understand!" Sagari exclaimed gasping for breath. Her voice was raspy from screaming. "I did what I had to. Roy I always had your best interest in mind." I stepped in front of Wolf stopping her from ending it.

"No I understand enough you got me thrown into this mess! Why me? Why did you choose me?!" I had obviously lost my cool at this point.

Sagari began to cry.

"I saw your potential Roy! Izzy was a necessary loss. Don't you see that? I had amazing plans for you. You would do so much good! But then...." She looked at Wolf, hatred burning in her eyes. "She came along and corrupted you. When Izzy died you were supposed to finally see people like her for what they truly were......monsters!"

"Your the only monster here Sagari. Because of you the women I loved more than anything in the world is gone." I said as tears began to stream from my eyes. I couldn't help it god dammit.

“I'm the monster? Did you hear what I told your ‘friend’ a few minutes ago. Do you know how I know that’s what happened? I was there! I was only five years old and I was forced to witness it all.” She started to laugh through her tears “My brother thought that thing was some type of god but he is not. The Slenderman is an animal that must be put down just like all of his followers, for they are a cancer on the world, only capable of corruption and death”

My eyes widened as I realized how similar her situation was to mine. The only difference was how we chose to deal with it. I realized in her twisted thought process she was only doing what she thought was right.

“You’re a delight, Sagari.” Wolf said “It has been a pleasure, but I do think it is just about time to end this, wouldn’t you say Roy?”

“Wait Wolf….” Somehow I think she already knew what I was going to say. “We…we have her beaten, let’s just walk away.

“Oh Roy…”

“I know what you’re going to say… I know how this is going to sound but we shouldn't kill her. I don’t want any more blood on my hands than necessary.”

“Then you walk away and let me do it, hero. She has made it abundantly clear that she wishes me dead. Killing her now, before she gets a chance to make good on her threats seems like the most practical course of action. If you can’t then I will. I’ll be the monster. I’ll carry the sin; no blood on your hands”

“You know I can’t do that either”

“Why not? She is the reason that you’re here, is she not? She brought you and Izzy into this mess then had the gall to torture you the second you disobeyed. She could try it again. She could attempt revenge on you. Do you really want to leave an enemy that could come back to harm you later? What happened to your resolve? "

“I know. I remember what she did and I want to kill her. I want stab her in the fucking face for the misery she brought upon my life. But I understand now. She's suffered just like us. If we do this we're no better than her."

“What did I tell you before, hero? Everybody has a sad story to tell. Her story does not excuse her actions any more than mine does. We all must take responsibility for the path we choose.”

“I agree, but there’s a better way than this. Her hate has consumed her and led her to try to take revenge on all of your kind, without exception and without seeing the individuals that make up the group. I don’t want to follow the same path by seeking revenge back on her. Instead we should give her the chance to see that she was wrong and decide to change. You can teach her that things aren’t as black and white as she would like to think.” I looked at her with pleading eyes. "I can't stop you from doing this Wolf you know that. But please...there doesn't have to be anymore bloodshed."

“…God damn it Roy, you play the game too well sometimes. Fine, I will show mercy. I don’t like this but I’ll do it for your sake, if nothing else.”

“Thank you, my friend” I said, breathing a sigh of relief

“Heh… Always too kind for your own good. Always trying to rise above and save everyone But then, that is why you remain a hero in my eyes.”

She turned to Sagari.

“As for you, my dear, count yourself lucky and learn from this. Know that should you threaten me or Roy again, I will not show this same mercy. ”

At this point the adrenaline chose to leave my body. All the affects from the blood loss, and the pain hit me at once and my vision once again began to blur. Wolf looked at me.

"Well dear ready to go home?"

"Well Wolf....with that done I think I'm going to go ahead and die...."

and then everything went black.

.............................................................................................................................................


Apparently from there Wolf took me to one of Hart's contacts, a doctor. Though I am still injured I feel I have overstayed my welcome. Were lucky Slender hasn't appeared yet. So I will be leaving very soon. 

heheh.....I probably shouldn't even be up right now. My wounds feel like there on fire. But I've always had a problem with sitting still.

Anyways...I also have another problem...I noticed it when I woke up. That.....that damn song. It's back.  At first I was confused....But I may have an idea of why it has returned. I thought when Sagari had touched my forehead she had destroyed his influence. But I realize that no one can destroy it. She had simply blocked it, put up a wall. By fighting Sagari I had cut ties with her and Sanctuary effectively destroying said wall. I'm not too worried yet it is only softly in the back of my head.

I have yet to inform Wolf.

well......this may be it

Tomorrow I fight Sagari with Wolf. I feel as though I'm marching to my death. So this post will be short.

I wanted to make sure to thank you guys for all of your help and support. I couldn't have survived this long without you all. So thank you. I guess that's all I have to say.

Until next time.....if there is one.

-Roy

MUSIC!!!!

So pain killers wore off already, faster than I thought they would. I'm now terribly embarrassed, Fell hates me even more if possible, and Harts avoiding me like the plague(I must of done something). I think I also may have irritated Wolf. Which I really hope I didn't do.

Anyways I've taken notice that many Bloggers have been using music. So I decided this post would be dedicated to a music. A song for some of the fears:

Slenderman: oh my god just.....I love this

The Cold Boy: ..........  :'(

The Black Dog: I didn't encounter him just wanted to do him anyways

The Empty City: Not sure I actually encountered this one putting it on here just in case....also not to fond of this band just thought this song just fit.

The Unnamed Child: theme song of my life.

Darkness: pretty much just for the title.

For people:

Wolf: It's cheesy as hell and annoys the crap outta me but I hope it gets the point across.

Fell: hopefully this doesn't just piss you off even more...

Med: Thought you'd appreciate this...or it would irritate you. Either way *shrugs* made me laugh my ass off.

Ash or Spyre or whoever you are at the moment: Never been a big Beatles fan but figured you could use something to cheer you up.

Rose: Nick showed me this one...it scarred me for life. I picked it because I know how much you love skittles.

Nick: reminds me of you.



So there MUSIC FOR ALL. Except the ones I forgot. ROY OUT!

Yayyyyyyy

Ohh myyyyy goooooddd I found pain meds in my backpack I actually forgot I had these

My hands WERE hurting but not anymore cuz I took a bunch buuut I think may have took a few too many...SO how are you guys today??? I was good but Hart won't play video games with me...probably cuz I whooped his ass last time.

I was gonna ask Fell to spar but Wolf told me that was a bad idea soooooo then I asked Wolf if she wanted to spar and she said something like "your not in the right state of mind and blah blah blah...." So yea.

I'm gonna go bug Wolf to spar again byeeeee

Laziness

Had a friendly dinner with Wolf this evening. It was nice...felt almost normal. I'm too tired to type anything else so if you want anymore details just look here.

Kay goodnight everyone.

"Did you play that game I told you about?" Izzy asked. We sat on the couch her head on my shoulder as I held her.

"Of course dear."

"And?" She asked me in her usual excited tone.

"Terrified the hell outta me." She giggled sweetly at this.

"Oh? Is my big strong man scared of a faceless business man?" She asked in a mocking tone.

I let out a throaty chuckle, holding her tighter. "Are you kidding me? Of course not. As if something like that could be real."

She brushed her lips against mine. "You know I love you right?" She asked.

"I love you to." I said flustered from the simple kiss. God I was such a wuss back then.

"Sure your not scared?" She asked teasing me.

Another chuckle. "Yes I'm sure. Where did you hear about this Slenderman anyways?"

"It was this girl I met on the way back from my accounting class."

"Yea?"

"Yeah! She bumped into me spilling my coffee and she was so apologetic. She offered to buy me lunch and you know I never turn down a free lunch."

"Yea I know." I said grinning at her.

"So over lunch we learned more about each other and found we both loved all things horror. From there she asked me if I had ever heard of the slenderman. She went on telling me about him. When I got home I looked him up and found myself unable to stop researching him. He's just so damn fascinating!" She finally stopped and took a breath.

"Does this mystery girl have a name?"

"I can't really remember....I'm sure she told me."

"Well what did she look like then? I might have saw her around campus."

"She was pale and....oh yeah! She must have been foreign or something because she claimed it was natural."

"Claimed that what was natural?"

"She had the most beautiful light green hair."

The cabin

I had been waiting outside the hotel with a backpack full of my weapons. When I felt a tap on my shoulder I yelped in surprise. I hadn't heard anyone approach. I quickly turned hand already reaching for my trusty dagger. When I saw the mask I froze. I felt a mix of terror and surprise. How had I let one get so close to me? My mind raced with ways to escape the situation when....

"Roy I presume?" A women's voice asked in a very polite tone. While I couldn't see her face I'm sure she was smirking at my look of terror. That damnable mask scared the hell out of me. I simply nodded calming down but only slightly.

"Wolf?" I asked, unsure. She nodded and gestured for me to follow. I did with hesitance still slightly nervous. As we walked she took my hand and our surroundings blurred and were replaced by trees. I nervously looked back seeing that there was no exit. As I looked around I instantly felt on edge. I could easily tell who had created it. The whole place had that slender touch to it.

I heard Wolf chuckle at my look of awe and terror. "Oh calm down dear." I snapped out my terror induced daze at the sound of her voice. As we came to the clearing I saw the cabin.

"So this is it then? This is the cabin?" I asked. It was in one word simple. Not sure what I had expected.

I saw, leaning against the front of the cabin, a masked women. Even with the mask on I could tell she was glaring at me. I assumed this was Fell. I extended my hand in greeting. She strode up to me ignoring the hand and proceeded to tell me that if any harm came to Wolf because of me she would end me. Fell of course used much more....colorful words.

"I'm sorry about that, If you will just follow me." Wolf walked inside and with hesitance I stepped inside as well. As I set down my book bag Wolf spoke. "Welcome home dear." She said this with a sigh and a laugh. "If you need anything ask Hart. I'm going to go check on Fell." With that she walked further into the cabin. I asked Hart where the computer was and he showed me before going and sitting down.

I can already tell me and Fell are not going to become friends. Luckily Hart seems nice enough. God my hands hurt. This is going to be a long week.

I'm leaving

I'm going somewhere safe. Somewhere where hopefully Sagari can't find me. Wolf has agreed to take me to the cabin. Even if she reads this I doubt she can enter the cabin. Only Wolf and Slendy can find their way there.

So Strider if your reading this you don't have to go to Germany anymore.

I'll post again as soon as I can.

One week

I woke up with a low groan, moving to stretch out a bit before noticing I was tied to a chair I instantly panicked and began to struggle against the bonds but to no avail.

"there's no use struggling you know." I looked up to see the owner of the voice was Sagari yet she looked different somehow. Her eyes held an angry glint to them. "That there is steel wire tied to you, the more you struggle the more you'll just hurt yourself" I could feel it digging into my skin painfully. Yet I kept my calm demeanor, never let them see you sweat. I strangely wasn't shocked in this situation.

"What's going on Sagari why am I tied up?" She actually chuckled at this.

"What Roy you didn't think I kept up with your little blog? I know you don't plan to kill her. The damn monster." She spat the last part. "and why should you? it's not like she's some murderous psychopath that kills for fun and works for the creature that ruined your life." she said this in a sarcastic tone.

"A hero doesn't hurt those precious to him." I said this, trying to keep my voice as steady as I could. She started laughing loudly.

"You a hero? that's what she calls you right? There are no heroes in this life Roy, surely you must see that. Even if there were heroes what would qualify you to be one? What have you actually done that did anyone any good? All you've done is get your friends killed. Like Izzy, poor Izzy her boyfriend was too weak to save her." Every word struck me to the core and stung as I realized she was right. What had I actually done to contribute to this fight? So far I had done nothing but run. "just why is she so precious to you? Don't you realize that if she was ordered by the tentacled bastard she wouldn't hesitate to kill you. She's not your friend. She's just toying with you. Your nothing but a source of amusement to her."

I sat there in silence, my head tilted down as my hair draped in front of my eyes. I was trying my best to banish any thought of Izzy from my head as the image of her death flashed throughout my head over and over. I couldn't cry, not now.

"You will kill her Roy." Sagari said firmly and with authority.

"No"

"What did you say?"

"Did I stutt-" she cut me off with a swift and powerful punch to my face, instantly I could feel a welt rising from the impact.

"It would seem I need to teach you a lesson." she stated with a sigh, giving me a cold stare. She left the room and after a few minutes came back with a small plain box that gave me a bad feeling. She removed from the box a scalpel, the light shining off the edge of the blade. I tried to keep a straight expression but I could feel myself faltering. "Remember Roy you did this to yourself." She slowly began to drive the tip into knuckle of my hand, blood began to well up and I gritted my teeth as she drove the blade down into bone, I wouldn't yell. By the time she stopped each knuckle was a bloodied mess. She put away the blood caked scalpel calmly. "So what have you learned?"

I grinned slightly through the pain, before spitting down on her shoes. "That your a psychotic bitch." I laughed, oh how it hurt to laugh. Her face twitched with rage as she reached into the box pulling out a thin and long needle, and began to drive it beneath my nail, reaching into the box again as she drove in more into each nail, the pain was excruciating as she slowly drove each of them deeper and deeper. This time I couldn't stop myself from yelling out in pain as she drove the last needle beneath my nail. She then reached and grabbed a hammer from the box, smashing it down onto my finger tips, the needles bent and stabbed at the bones in my hand, I shouted out once more in agony as she dropped the hammer and it landed on the ground with a clang, my fingertips now a mangled mess.

"You WILL kill her!" She shouted angrily, her face beginning to tinge red with rage.

I looked up, my vision starting to haze a bit at the edges, my chest heaving as I panted from the pain. "Go to hell." I said weakly. She then took out a syringe, and slowly began to fill it up with a clear liquid. I could only watch dizzily as she began to inject the needle into my arm. At first nothing but the prick of the needle was felt, and then slowly a searing pain striked up my arms. I screamed loudly as I tried to arch my back, the wire drawing beads of blood as I struggled against the bonds. This seemed to go on for hours, until a red haze began to fog my vision before I was claimed by the darkness I got a last glimpse at Sagari's face. She was glaring down at my coldly, and then I blacked out.
...............................................................................................................................................

I woke up back at the hotel room and looked around a bit before noticing each of my fingers were tightly bandaged. I slowly went to flex them when suddenly a sharp pain pierced up along my hands, I winced and bit back a shout. So it had been real I realized, the bandages beginning to get stained red as fresh blood spilled from my fingers. I looked over and saw a note on the nightstand.

Dear Roy,


I'm sorry for what you made me do. But maybe next time you will think twice before disobeying me. I no longer give you the option of choosing your first target. As apart of your punishment your first target is her and I know you know who I'm talking about. You have one week to take care of her. If you don't I will kill her myself and then kill you shortly afterwards. You only have one week Roy so you better get to it!

Sincerely,
Sagari

Well I should re-bandage myself, I'll post if anything happens.

Another quick update

Surprisingly today has been relatively quiet. Sagari still isn't back yet which I guess is a good thing. So with nothing else to do I've sat in this same hotel room playing Super Nintendo and watching YouTube videos. Yea it's not been a very productive day.

I also beat that new Slender game Slender: the arrival. I was not surprised to find the game not nearly as scary as before.

I guess I should try and get some sleep

So she finally shows up

Yea she showed up at my door. I was pissed until I noticed she was covered in blood. But by the way she was smiling it probably wasn't hers.

A quick hug later she told me how happy she was to see me. I asked her where she had been.

Sagari: can I take a shower first?

I chuckled, embarrassed. I nodded and she went to take a shower and sat down in the chair dosing off. She woke me up about 15 minutes later clad only in a towel. I instantly woke up screaming a loud "What the hell!!" She raised a brow at this. She asked if I had some clothes she could borrow. I threw her some clothes covering my eyes. I'm sure my face was aflame. I'm not good in these situations.

She came back out my clothes slightly baggy on her. "You asked where I was?" She asked me.

I was snapped out my daze. "Uhhhh yea...."

"Let's just say I ran into some trouble."

"Uh okay. I guess I'm glad your here. I don't have the azoth yet. I've had trouble drawing him out. I'm not even sure how I plan to obtain the azoth. I guess I could cut off one of his tentacles. Though not sure how I'm going to pull that off..." I adopted a thinking look at this point.

"I have something for you that will probably help. I'll visit sanctuary and grab it later."

"Well Strider will be here in a couple of days to help me so..."

"Cool in the meantime I have a couple other things I'd like you to take care of." Her face turning serious. Taking out a list she handed it to me. It was a list of names. "I feel some proxies need to be taken care of."

Not bothering to look at the list I gave her a questioning look. "Whys that?"

"Their kill count is growing. They need to be taken care of."

"When you say take care of do you mean..."

"See to it as you see fit. Kill them, free them doesn't matter. Just get to it."

She went to leave. "Where are you going?"

"Sanctuary." She stated simply. "I'll be back later. Look over the list and pick your first target. Doesn't matter what order you choose. When I get back you'll get started." With that she left.

I quickly scanned the list. My eyes widened at some of the names. My heart dropped at the last couple in particular.

"Aww hell..."

Inspiring isn't it?

Just the idea that a mere human could injure Slender to this degree. Even though it's just a story.

Now if only he could be hurt so easily.

IM SICK OF THE GOD DAMN NOTES!!!!!

Sagari didn't show.........again. In her place ANOTHER FUCKING NOTE. This is getting really old.

Her note explained that she needed for me to obtain some azoth aka "slender sludge".

Okay so:

1. Someone explain what this substance is. It seems to pop in a lot of different blogs but I'm still not exactly sure what it is.

2. How would I go about obtaining said substance?

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Bored pt.2

Back at the hotel in town. Finally got a call from Sagari. She told me she would be at my hotel come morning. So once again I find myself bored as hell.....who wants to chat?

quick update

So arrived in Germany without a hitch. It's quite beautiful here by the way.

I'm actually updating from my phone right now. The Black Forest is quite beautiful. Though It makes me feel on edge. It just feels wrong. Like I'm not welcome here. Though that's most likely my own paranoia getting to me. Sagari's a no show.....again. I tried the number she had called me from and it was disconnected. I tried sleeping but I kept tossing and turning in my bed last night, but sleep never came to me, I think im starting to suffer from jet lag. So with nothing else to do I decided to take a walk. My eyes began to droop as I finally fell asleep.....in the forest. Though I can't really seem to remember lying down, I woke up as the sun began to rise, the heat warming my skin as I leaned up from a bed of moss, I groaned as my back stretched and cracked, surprised that our suited friend hadn't moved me around.

Now that I think about he hasn't appeared once. I'm not too sure thats a good thing. Anyways tired and dirty from my nap in the woods I'm heading back to town. See yall later!

What happened

I've put this off long enough....

What happened that night? You may be wondering why I was a raging drunk a while back. I never really explained what happened that night.

I followed the instructions written on the back of Nick's note. It led to a small abandoned warehouse. Feeling the sickening feeling of deja vu. I continued anyways. Walking in my hand reaching for my dagger. I then noticed that in my haste I hadn't brought any weapons. Gritting my teeth I continued in. I noticed Nick standing underneath a single light, that same devious smirk on his face. I also took notice that Sagari was not present. I turned quickly to leave just as Izzy slammed the door shut behind me.


N: So you came! Good to see your as stupid as I thought you were.

R: So what now? You've brought me here to kill me I assume?

Izzy responded this time with a chipper tone.

I: Yep daddy finally gave us the OK to kill you! Isn't that great dear?

I tensed up as Nick walked forward slowly. When he was close enough he lashed out with his hand. A stinging pain lanced up the side of my face as the back of his hand struck. I retaliated with a swing at his head that he was easily able to dodge. Grabbing my arm he flipped over his shoulder. I layed there gasping for a moment, shocked. He mocked me about how I had never been able to beat him before and to get up because the beating was just beginning. I shakily stood as he slammed his fist into my collarbone, and then into my torso, searing pain exploded along my body as he continued a barrage of punches. I could do nothing but weakly try to block, unsuccessfully.

By the end of his beating blood was trickling from the sides of my mouth and at this point I was thinking how this was it. I was really gonna die.

I: Nick! I'm supposed to be the one who kills hiiimmm!

Izzy whined. Nick sighed and looked to her, shrugging a bit as he gave his neck a slight crack before replying with annoyance present in his tone.

N: Fine, but make it quick. We have to get back.

Izzy walked up to me. Brandishing a knife. She brushed her lips on mine. Mocking me.

I: well Roy looks like this is the end. It was fun.

As she raised the knife. I did the last thing I could think to do. Faster then I thought I could move at that point I touched my hand to Izzy's forehead. Her eyes seemed to become glossy before the warehouse around me disappeared. I found myself outside of a forest, The sun shining.

I had never tried to free someone before. I assumed this was Izzy's mental plane. I walked up to the forest. The closer I got to the forest the darker the sky got until it was night.

I entered forest and I could feel his presence. Following me as I walked. He would appear in the corner of my before disappearing quickly. I moved breaking into a sprint. I wasn't sure what exactly I was looking for honestly.

But once I came to a small clearing to what I assumed was the center of the forest. I knew what I was looking for was here. I saw in the middle lying down.....it was Izzy. She looked as though she was asleep. Sagari spoke as though this would be hard. It seemed all I would have to do was wake her up.

But as I walked forward HE appeared. Instantly one of his tentacles shot forward impacting me in the chest knocking me through one of the trees. I was surprised to find that it actually hurt to get hit in the mental plane.

I got up rushing forward again only to be once again swatted away by one of the many tentacles. This went on for awhile. Finally I was able to sidestep around him. I ran towards Izzy as fast as I could. As soon as I did I tapped her forehead waking her. Night turned to day.

The forest vanished and I was once again in the warehouse. Izzy's eyes focused once more on me and she looked confused dropping her knife.

I: Roy? What's going on? Where ar-BANG

The shot echoed throughout the warehouse. As the bullet entered her skull all I could do was watch in shock as she fell to the ground, blood instantly began to seep into my shoes and clothing, painting the floor crimson. I fell to my knees and cradled her. Just staring at her now lifeless eyes. I didn't even turn my head as Nick spoke.

N: it's a shame really. She was a damn good proxy. I would kill you myself but I feel as though I should let you wallow in your misery just awhile longer. Don't worry though ill see you again. Try not to get anyone else killed, alright?

With that he walked out not before saying they were free to kill me. I didn't even register the words as 10 masked figures came from the shadows. Each brandishing a different weapon. They all snickered as who I assumed the leader was stepped forward. He told the others he would take care of this. Walking forward crow bar in hand.

I laid a kiss on Izzy's forehead before shutting her eyes and standing to my feet. I picked up the knife she had dropped. The proxy charged forward swinging the crowbar aiming for my head. I ducked before slitting his throat. I watched with cold eyes as he fell to his knees choking on blood. The red liquid staining the floor.

The others seemed shocked before charging forward. All at once. I was just one man after all. It was there mistake. I remember the rest in perfect detail. Every broken bone, slit throat, every sliced tendon. This was no fight this was a massacre. I killed everyone with indifference feeling nothing. Even the last one. He was on his knees begging me for his life. Telling me he became a proxy to protect his 6 year old sister. That he was all she had left. I didn't care as I stuck the knife slowly into his forehead, killing him painfully.

I looked around at my handy work then at my blood stained hands. I walked out of the warehouse. Wandering through the streets I went and grabbed a bottle of vodka, throwing the money at the cashier as i left.

As I walked home I felt warm drops of water running down my cheeks. "It must be raining" I thought aloud numbly. I looked expecting to see dark clouds in the sky, raining.

There was no rain that night.

Where it all began

http://darknessonlyconfirmswhatwecannotsee.blogspot.com/2013/05/i-kicked-in-front-door-hello-roy-you.html

After my fight with Strider, who I'm still pissed with, I made my way back to my hotel room and bandaged myself up. I know I have a cracked rib. But I'm not going to the hospital. Not going to explain why......
I checked my cell phone and noticed I had 6 missed calls from an unknown number. I called the number and a panicked female voice answered.

"Roy?!" This was Sagari and I was surprised that she was panicked. It wasn't like her.

"Sagari? Whats wrong? Wait why didn't you meet me in Toronto?" I was slightly annoyed that she hadn't showed but my worry overpowered it.

"I'm sorry about that Roy.....but I need you to make one more trip for me."

"and where am I to go now?"

"To where it all began Roy.....The Black Forest."

"You want me to go to Germany? Infamous Slender man hot spot?" She chuckled though still sounding nervous.

"I'll see you here Roy." With a beep the line went dead.

So Germany huh? I think it's time I stop running. I think it's time I start fighting. So I leave in the morning.

One other thing that feels slightly irrelevant. Remember how I said creepypasta helped me relax. I found one that actually scares me and it's actually causing me nightmares. Most are in dark hallways as a man with a maniac grin chases me with his knife. Before killing me telling me to "GO TO SLEEP". Though I know impossible for someone such as Jeff to exist(knock on wood).....he terrifies me. I find it funny that out of all the monsters I face and the monsters found on creepypasta the one that scares me is a human.

Leaving NOW

Okay gotta type this in a hurry! I was getting coffee today and on the way back to hotel I saw Strider walking down the street. He had a small group with him. So it would seem he doesn't plan on fighting fair. With that in mind I put my hood up and walked past, he didn't seem to notice me. I got back to the hotel and my room was a mess. Obviously someone *cough* Strider *cough* was here and going through my stuff. So he knows where I am and I'm outnumbered. With that in mind I'm packing up what supplies I have and leaving.

I'll stay here until dark and then I'll slip out of the city. I'll post again when I can.

relaxing

Been awhile since I listened to a good creepypasta. It's actually my strange way of relaxing. Anyways I love how this guy reads this.

Utterly beautiful.....

Lets keep this brief

God my head hurts...hard to really focus on anything so this post will be short.

I woke up this morning with a empty bottle of vodka and a really bad headache. Last nights a bit of a blur. But when I checked the blog and read my last post.....I acted like a lunatic. It occurs to me I owe some people apologies.

Med I'm sorry really I am...you and wolf may have actually saved my life. I'm pretty sure you distracted me till I passed out.

Wolf I feel like all I did was rub salt in old wounds. I know you know what it is to suffer....and even my alcohol affected brain was hit hard by what you said. I'm truly sorry. I wish I could be the hero you call me. Heroes help people and do good. I'm not sure how much good I've actually done. All I've shown you is a pathetic man who is easily broken and runs at the first sign of trouble. Just a fool.

Ill explain everything that happened later. For now I'm heading to the drug store for some aspirin.

HAHAHAHAHA vodka is graet......hahaha have you ever tried it faceless? HAHAHAHAHA so gooooooood why don't you have one on me? Go ahead have a seat. You know I don't like u.....u you ruined my life ya know. Why don't you come in faceless? It would be more comfy then standing there at the window......

U ruined my life...... You know you guys there's something I never told you. I never told you HAHAHAHAHA what was I thinking? Maybe I should just end it all. How would that make you feel faceless!!???!!?!? Just take this knife and slit my throat. BETTER THIS WAY HUH?

yea maybe it would be better this way.....

more notes....great

Still no sign of Sagari but now I know why....I found another note on my night stand this morning.


       Dear "Brother",
My word, Canada sure is quite nice this time of the year, wouldn't you agree? Anyways enough about your vacation. I will get down to the gritty part, plain and simple. Sagari is in my hands, and if you do not come to the location in which the directions are listed on the back of this letter. She will be killed. I'll see you there.

                                                                                                   Sincerely, Your "Brother"
                                                                                                                 -Nickalas Quin

So Nick already got here before me and somehow was able to kidnap Sagari. So I'll be heading over there tonight. Most likely to my imminent doom. But If by some miracle I survive I'll make sure Nick is dead before I leave.

Sagari has done a lot for me....I can't just let her die.

I'll se y'all later.......maybe

Strider

I don't know if any of you know what's going on but uh here:

http://darknessonlyconfirmswhatwecannotsee.blogspot.com/2013/05/so.html?m=1

He thinks I'm trying to kill him. So Strider if your reading this pay attention closely to the next sentence.

I DID NOT PUT A HIT ON YOU.

But I know your not going to take my word for it. So I want you know something and it may seem harsh. Strider your my friend but if you come looking for a fight I won't hesitate to end you and don't think for 1 minute that I can't. If you want I don't mind sitting with you and talking things through. But if your looking for a fight ill give you one.

I'm no traitor and shame to those who would think for one minute that I am.

Anyways I'm in Toronto now and I couldn't find Sagari so ill be staying In another hotel for the night. See y'all later.

Vacation

Woke up this morning in the hotel and I noticed their was an envelope on my nightstand. One that hadn't been there the night before. I opened it slowly almost as if I expected it to explode. In the envelope was 500 dollars, a ticket for a plane, and a note. The note simply said:

I'll be waiting - Sagari

I looked at the plane ticket. Looks like I'm heading to Toronto. Though I doubt it's going to be a vacation.

Home

I made it to my parents house yesterday. I was cautious trying to see them without actually coming into contact with them. But I couldn't see anything from where I was. So I panicked. I quickly ran to the front door. *face palm* I know bad idea.

I opened the door slowly and walked in. I heard someone coming down the stairs. I reached for my dagger and was horrified when I realized I didn't have it with me. A sigh of relief escaped my mouth when I noticed it was mom. She seemed excited when she saw me and walked up giving me a hug. It really was good to see her.

"Roy! It's been too long." She exclaimed squeezing me tighter.

Her words were true. "I know I've missed you guys." My words were true I really had. It was good to see someone close to me who wasn't effected by this mess.

Her face suddenly turned angry. "You couldn't have at least called? We haven't heard from you in 3 years!" But her eyes softened after saying this. "Oh it doesn't matter at least the family's back together again."

I paused at this. Could it be true then? No there was no way. "What?" I asked stupidly.

"Yea Nick arrived yesterday. He's upstairs playing chess with your father." She replied happily.

My blood ran cold. So he was alive. I walked past mom slowly ascending the stairs. I felt vulnerable without a weapon but I didn't think Nick would try anything while he was here. When I got upstairs I walked to my parents room and opened the door. There he was good as new, other than a angry crimson colored scar on his throat, there he was playing chess as though nothing was wrong. He looked at me a pleasant smile coming to his face as he took out dad's bishop with a knight casually before turning to me, his smile broadening. I could tell it was fake though.

He stood up suddenly. Looking at dad. "Hey, pop. I think I'm going to go out for a stroll with Roy."

"Yea alright." Dad responded absentmindedly, still observing the board with a look of intense concentration. He didn't even acknowledge my presence. He always get like this when he plays chess.

We walked outside and when I turned to Nick, he was no longer smiling at least not the fake one from before. He was giving me a devious smirk with a cruel glint in his eyes.

"Let's have a chat shall we?" After he had said this Slendy suddenly appeared. He grabbed us both before a feeling of almost spinning through a whirlwind came, after I found myself on the path. Slendy had vanished.

"The path is beautiful isn't it?" He asked casually, as if this was perfectly fine.

"Nick what the hell is going on?! How are you alive and why are you being such a douche?!" I asked this angrily. His expression tightened as he glanced at me with a bleak expression.

"Because you got me killed. You know how much it hurts to die?! How much it hurts to know that your best friend could've saved you, but didn't?!"

"I did what I could and nothing less! Do you really think that if I could've saved you I wouldn't have?" my voice started to crack and soften as he got louder and angrier.

"You picked some dumb bitch you met 3 days before over your own brother!"

"I didn't pick her! Izzy chose to kill you first!"

"No it was your choice, and you chose that girl. And we both know how that turned out!"

That one stung. He was rubbing salt in wounds that hadn't fully healed. His face changed to one of a calm expression.

"It doesn't matter Roy it was your fault I died. I want you gone as soon as we're back. I'm letting you leave now but know this. Next time we meet I will kill you." Suddenly we were back in front of the house. I gave the house one look and left. I couldn't risk it I had no weapons on me at the time.

So I'm back at the hotel and I'm not to sure what to do now. I just need to get away for awhile.

What to do?

At another motel, had to take a rest. Can't sleep. It seems Darkness wants me dead she had two shadows following me. I noticed them While I was in a cafe just sipping some coffee. I noticed that there were a couple of shadows that seemed off. I walked down the street after I left the cafe and knew they were still following me. I walked into an alleyway and they rose from there shadows attacking me. I was ready though I quickly disarmed both and snapped one of their necks. The other one I slit his throat with his own blade. 

Usually I wouldn't take to killing so easily. But as of late I've already been in a bad mood. So Darkness if you can somehow read this know that if you send anymore of your lackeys after me they will suffer the same fate as these two.

I'll be hitting the road soon I'm almost to my parents house.

Nick

The blood sprayed from his throat. He had such a look of fear in his eyes as the life drained from his face. This memory is still quite fresh in my mind. I've tried to forget. I really have. He was my brother in everything but blood. I miss him. I miss my brother.

If you saw the comments last chapter you know that there was some bastard posing as Nick. It made me angry and it brought his death to the forefront of my mind. It also made me realize 2 things.

I left Nick's body back at my old house. He deserves a proper burial. I also realized that our parents don't even know that Nick is dead.

Against Strider's wishes I'm leaving the bunker to go retrieve his body. With darkness' shadows after me this isn't going to be a safe trip and I may not be coming back from it. I've packed my bag full of food and weapons. I know Strider would try to stop me so it's good he's away at the path. Aveline already tried to stop me. I had to knock her unconscious.

Sorry Strider this is a trip I have to take alone. I'll return in a week or so. If I'm not dead.

I'll post when I can.

So Nikolai came back with Strider today. We were lucky that he was tired and he let us take his weapons. He won't take his pills and he keeps screaming something about 'TRAINING IN THE RAIN'. I haven't slept in days with looking after the injured and now I don't feel safe sleeping with crazy Strider running around the place.

I would force him but I still feel that punch he gave me and the idea of what Strider off his meds would do kind of scares me. Me and Nikolai finally convinced Aveline that we would handle it and that she could rest. So shes sleeping in the next room right now.

As if Strider wasn't enough we've been having a lot of sightings of Smiley on the camera feed. I also had my first encounter with Darkness. I'd been sitting outside the bunker looking at the stars.

I knew someone was near by.

"Who are you and tell me why I shouldn't kill you right now" I had been getting edgy from the sleep deprivation.

"Now is that anyway to greet a guest?" When she stepped out of the shadows. Though I had never met her I knew from Spyre's different accounts that this was Darkness.

Instantly I was on guard slowly reaching for the dagger I had taken to keeping on my belt. My hand rested on the hilt. "Why are you here?" I asked in what I hoped was a threatening tone.

She chuckled. "Oh please you don't expect to hurt me with that little toy, do you?" She was taunting me. After what she had done to Spyre seeing her here mocking smirk on her face, it made my blood boil.

"I don't like repeating myself. Why are you here?" I asked her again.

"Just to have a little chat." She explained in a matter of fact tone.

"Really now? Somehow I doubt you came here just to talk to me." I was trying to stay calm. I didn't want to do anything rash.

"I'm not here to speak with you. I'm here for Strider. He and me have something to settle." Anger flickered in her eyes if only for a second.

"Your not entering here." I went to draw my dagger. She appeared suddenly in front of me hand on my wrist. Her touch was cold. It was painful. Her grip was strong and I was tired. When a voice spoke up.

"Let go....now darkness!" I looked over and saw Sagari. I was surprised she was here. It seemed darkness was to because her grip loosened enough for me to rip my hand away. She glared at Sagari for a moment before disappearing.

Sagari sighed " I can't be saving you all the time Roy."

"So why are you here Sagari?" Her face turned serious.

"I don't really know what but Smileys planning something. Something big and it has something to do with you."

Me and Sagari talked for another hour or so before she had to travel back to Sanctuary.

Strider just started yelling something....that is it! I'm tired of not sleeping. I'm going to go shove those pills down his throat.

I'll post again when I get some rest.

More good news and more bad news.

Good news: we found Aveline and the others who went after Strider.

Bad news: they were heavily injured and Strider is still no where to be found. Oh and there's the fact that there was no one else we found alive. The battlefield is littered with bodies. It's.....it's sickening.

I was easily able to bandage them up. I was studying to be a doctor before all of this after all. I just got done stitching up Aveline and I'm quite tired.

To my annoyance Nikolai made me wait here with the injured while he went looking for Strider. Now I'm just waiting here for hopefully both of them to get back. Ill post again if anything happens.

Damn it Strider where are you?

Well Crap

I don't really know what just happened....

I was just laying down resting, Aveline's orders, when the alarm went off an all I could here was the constant beep and screaming. It's been kind of tense here at the bunker lately because of this proxy army threat combined with the fact that Strider ran out of his meds recently.

I got up cringing I still wasn't even near 100% so I really hoped that no one had found there way into the bunker because while I could handle a normal proxy, I would be next to useless against anything more powerful than that.

I made my way to the command center only to see that Nikolai was the only one there. I looked to the camera feeds to see that Strider had rushed on to the battlefield in his unmedicated state. I quickly yelled to Nikolai that I was going after him.

Nikolai stopped me by telling me that the only thing I could do in my injured state was get killed. He told me that Aveline and the others had already went after him so there was no need to worry. Didn't help me from worrying though.

All of the sudden I saw slendy appear on the camera feed before all of the camera feeds were filled with static. A few minutes the static went away and we saw that it looked as though everyone was dead.

Nikolai told me to gather what weapons I had and he would come get me when he was done gathering some supplies.

I already gathered my silver dagger and a few throwing knives so I'm just waiting for Nikolai while I type this.

We're going out to the battlefield and I'm slightly afraid of what we'll find. Oh looks like Nikolai is ready so ill post as soon as I can. Hopefully with good news.

Back from the dead

Yea so Dying? Really....I mean REALLY sucks. Hurts like a bitch too. I don't recommend it to any of you.

Oh? Surprised? So am I. I shouldn't be alive right now. Oh yea so good news I'm alive. Bad news Izzy is too. More bad news.....Sagari informed me that the only way out of sanctuary was to make a mad dash through one of the domains. One of the Fear's domains.

That's not how I died though.

I died during Sagari's final "test".

I woke up yesterday morning to the smell of smoke. I panicked quickly flipping to my feet. Twin daggers already in hand. I ran out the door. What I saw made me freeze in horror. Sanctuary, the trees, the plants, all once so beautiful.....now on fire turning to ashes before my eyes.

From within the fire I saw Izzy walking towards me sporting a mad grin. She ran towards me with a straight sword in hand. We locked blades and with no words began a deadly dance. Exchanging blades for what felt like hours. I had many chances to end the fight that I didn't take hesitating to end her. Each time cost me. Where I hesitated Izzy did not leaving gash after gash on my body. I didn't feel the pain because of all the adrenaline shooting through my body. Until finally I ended it. I parried one of her attacks and everything seemed to slow down. I quickly spun around cleaving straight through her neck. Her head fell to the ground. The adrenaline left my body as the blood loss began to take effect and I fell to my knees. Shortly after I wrote the post and I shut my eyes death taking me.

I woke up this morning good as knew and confused as hell. Sagari chuckled at my look of confusion before explaining that it had been a test. She needed make sure I could kill when I needed to. She also explained that she could manipulate sanctuary to look as she wanted. It's also apparently impossible for me to permanently die while in sanctuary. Strange.

I packed up to leave through the path. But before I could Sagari gave me 2 gifts. One a dagger made of pure silver and the other the power to cleanse people of a fears influence and mark.

"I must warn you though" she told me. "If yours and the victims will cant over power the fears will it will transfer its will upon you making you it's new servant."

She told me that I wouldn't be able to get back unless sanctuary called me back. So after thanking her for all the help I was off.

That's when things went bad. I don't truly know what happened. One minute I'm sprinting through path the next moment I wake up with a hooded girl standing over me. I soon learned this was Aveline and that Strider had picked me up on the path and brought me back to his bunker. I learned that after I went on a panicked frenzy and attacked Aveline. Which I still feel guilty about.......here Strider gives a more detailed explanation then me.

http://darknessonlyconfirmswhatwecannotsee.blogspot.com/2013/04/well-roy-is-up-and-with-us-now-but-it.html?m=1

Damn seekers with there unnatural strength.

I have to get off Aveline is giving me a strict look because I'm supposed to be resting.

is this it then? I'm bleeding rather heavily. I killed Izzy

I guess this is goodbye then.... to all of those who helped me, thank you.

I should have listened to you wolf...been more careful and wolf I know this will sound strange but you were my closest friend.....my only friend hehe. you were definitely rather helpful during my rather short journey. So to you especially thank you.

my vision is getting blurry....its getting hard to focus...i dont want to die yet

hehe im dying and the first thing i run to is my blog im such an idiot

goodbye

Doubtful

I may have been a little hasty in stating that this Sagari was a hope. Some of you expressed concerns that I seemed so trusting of her. I guess after all that has happened I just want something like her to...to give me hope. heh irony

I've had some of the same doubts as you guys. Well I'm leaving after tomorrow. I have to get rest because Sagari said she had some final test for me tomorrow. I didn't like the glint in her eye.

Making It Official

I don't know if any of you payed attention to the comments on the last post but Med and Rose decided what this entity Sagari should be called. So might as well make it official.

Sagari is not a fear and she isn't human so I needed a name for her kind. Since the monsters we fight are known as fears, I shall now refer to Sagari as a Hope. Specifically a hope of Sanctuary.

Also I've been gaining some kick ass powers. I can't way to try them on the next enemy I come by. Oh you wanna know what they are? Well too bad. I've realized that I have to start being more subtle about my abilities.

So yeah sorry for the short post but that's all I have to say for now.

Sanctuary

I woke up in a small cottage. I cringed in pain as I sat up but I noticed that my wounds had been bandaged. I stumbled slowly to the door and was nearly blinded by daylight as I opened it. What I saw was truly breathtaking. If I was asked to describe the garden of Eden this would be it. There were beautiful trees all around and a large waterfall that turned into a small stream. What was slightly eerie though was the lack of animals. No birds or anything.

girl:"You really shouldn't be moving around your not fully healed."

I heard this from behind me and nearly jumped. When I turned around I saw a girl that looked around my age with light green hair that fell past her shoulders.

R: who are you and where the Hell am I?!

as you can imagine I wasn't in the best of moods. Betrayal seems to be quite the downer.

S: This place is known as Sanctuary and I am Sanctuary.

At my look of confusion she continued.

S: sanctuary is not a part of your dimension. It is its own dimension. It is my domain.

R; what do I call you then?

S: you may call me Sagari.

(Which she later informed me means sanctuary)

R: okay Sagari how did I get here?

S: I brought you here.

R: not that I'm not thankful you saved me but why?

S: because I see your potential and I couldn't simply let you die. I've brought you here to talk to you about a proposition.

R: a proposition?

S: yes I would like to train you. To be to me as the proxies are to what you call slenderman.

R: so basically your servant...

S: not exactly I will not take your will or make you do anything you don't want to. But I can grant you powers like the other fears do their servants.

R: is that what you are then? A fear? If that's the case I want nothing to do with you.

S: I am not one of those monsters you call a fear. I simply am an entity that wants this war to end.

R: why?

S: I have my reasons. These reasons are not important to you. Just know that I want these fears gone. If you accept I can give you strength. Strength that would rival that of Revenants.

R: you said powers. Powers like what?

S: for example I could give you the power to free people of HIS influence. I also noticed that he had marked you I could also take care of that for you.

R: I thought it was impossible to free people of HIS influence.

S: well this power is limited. It won't be possible for everyone. Some are simply too far gone.

R: why me though? Why bring me out of everyone else?

S: I only bring those here who have the potential to end this.

R: so I will end this?

S: I did not say that. I said you had the potential not that you would. You may very well have a awful bloody end. But I can guarantee that with the strength I give you you have a much better chance of avoiding such an end.

R: but there are much better choices for this. Why not echo, or Raggedy? There much more qualified for this.

S: your stronger than you give yourself credit for Roy. They have chosen their own path. This path is open to you Roy. But will you take it?

I took about an hour to truly just sit down and think. The power to free proxies? Though quite limited would be very helpful. I went back to her and told her I accepted. She walked forward and touched my forehead. My mind went blank for a few seconds before HIS song went quiet. She said to get rested that training would start tomorrow and that I would have to be rested.

That night I got the first true full nights sleep that I had had In a long time. When I awoke I felt truly rested. I walked outside only for a wooden sword to be thrown at me. I looked up to see Sagari with a sword. With a simple get ready she gave me one of the most brutal beatings of my life. We've trained a different weapon every day, we even went hand to hand one day. Everyday she has beaten me but I can feel myself getting stronger. I still have another week or so in sanctuary but then I leave and possibly join up with Strider.

Well she's calling for me to come outside. Well here we go again.

Tired

When I heard her scream I ran to her and flung the door open. She was gone and her place was a bouquet. A bouquet of black roses. Death....

After I typed up the post a couple of nights ago I ran off the next morning. I felt anger and HIS song grew louder. But I didn't try to calm down......I didn't want to calm down. We had explored the city the day before and there was only one place that Smiley could of took her. There was an old paper mill here in the town, it had been abandoned for years now. It was within running distance of where we had been staying.

I knew Slendy was following me. I assumed my rage had drawn him to me. But I didn't care at the moment. With any luck I could draw him into a fight with Smiley like last time.

I arrived at the paper mill and without a second thought quickly entered. Smiley was no where in sight and in the state I was in I didn't stop to question that at all. That's when I saw her tied to a chair. I breathed a sigh of relief. She was awake and she looked terrified. I quickly cut the ropes with the dagger I had grabbed. Grabbing her hand I assured Laura that everything would be okay. Right before she took a steel pipe to the back of my head.

When I woke up I was tied to a chair with Laura sitting in one in front of me. She greeted me with a happy "good morning sunshine". She saw that I was terribly confused. She then went about explaining everything. How she had been lying from the start, how she was a servant of the Smiling Man. Smiley wanted me for himself for what reason I'm not sure. She was all I had left in the world.... to know she was never my friend, that she had been lying the whole time, that now I had no one. I wasn't even mad. I just felt dead inside. I let the song take control. Laura was still rambling with her back turned to me. that was a mistake she would pay for dearly. I easily broke my bindings but she didn't seem to notice. I stood up put my hands on both hands sides of her neck and she only had time to let out a surprised gasp before.......Snap! I broke her neck in one swift move. Her lifeless body fell to the ground. When I noticed petals in the air.

One of the petals touched my shoulder and a gash appeared. I didn't feel it though.....I didn't really feel anything at the moment. I saw the smiling man in the corner. Picking up the steel pipe from earlier I slowly walked towards him. His petals were tearing my body to pieces but I didn't care. When I got close enough I swung and smashed his head open. I spent the what felt like hours swinging this pipe at Smileys now bloodied corpse. I dropped the pipe as Slender's song got softer. I suddenly felt extreme pain and fell to my knees. I knew I had lost alot of blood because my vision was getting blurry. But before I passed out I saw that a door had appeared, and it seemed to be calling to me. With the last of my strength I crawled to the door and opened it before passing out.

There's more to this and Ill put it in the next post. I'm just so....tired.

NO NO NONONONONONONO SHE CAN'T BE GONE

DAMN IT SMILEY YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS

I WILL FIND YOU AND RIP YOU TO PIECES

Family cont.

I've calmed down. His song is not as loud. Okay....c'mon Roy your in control. Okay where was I? Ah yes......

I had two brothers one was just 3 years older then me, the other was 13 years older than me. The younger was Jacob, the older was Seth. After what happened to our parents Seth became out provider. He was barely home because he had to work two jobs. But when he was he would school is saying "I won't have you grow up as dumb-asses pardon my French, just because we were scarred for life." He was a great brother. Always tried to make light of the situation.

Jacob was never the same after what happened. He rarely ever smiled again. But it was understandable. Me on the other hand I simply formed a mask. The day after it happened I was smiling again. But deep down I was wounded and it left a scar. I never truly got over it.

When I was 9 it started up again. Jacob had never been the same but he started to get worst. He started to become more and more secluded. Barely saying a word. It was unnerving how silent he would get. He would never tell us what was wrong.

When I was 12 he started keeping a notebook. Drawing in it all the time and he wouldn't show us what was inside. He would spend hours locked in his room drawing in that thing. We actually tried to take it away once or I did I guess. He proceeded to punch me breaking my jaw. While I was shocked he jumped on me raining blow after blow on my face. I ended up with a concussion. I didn't attempt to take his notebook after this. I avoided him after this.

He only got worse started getting sick, coughing up blood. It was like deja vu. One day while I was watching candle cove he said he was going out for a walk. I didn't say anything back because I actually feared him still. He never came back. The police searched for weeks didn't find any sign of him anywhere. I'm the one that found his notebook. I hid it under the floor boards of the house because I just thought something about it didn't feel right.

It still didn't end. The next time it was not a complex build up. There was no slender sickness, no fits of rage, no extreme paranoia, and no crazy demented drawings. It was my fifteenth birthday. While me and Seth were celebrating when he saw something out the window that seemed to make him mad. He told me to lock the doors and stay in my room. He ran towards the forest and never came back.

Like with Jacob there was no trace of him.

After all of this happened Nicks family adopted me. I moved to the city where they lived and tried to forget what had happened. You can repress.... But you never truly forget.

I'm sick of talking about this. Me and Laura are crashing in another house that's not ours. Something pretty funny actually happened today. I woke up to make breakfast for both of us and when I went to Oh god Laura just screamed gotta go

Family

I suppose I've put this off long enough. My childhood was not one of the best.... But I don't think the hospital is the first time I was in HIS presence. It was definitely the first time I had direct contact with him. But as I look back at my childhood some things never made sense to me. Now..... Now that I know about all of this it makes so much sense. It was in front me this whole time. It took me a while to put it all together because my childhood isn't something I like to think about too often.

It was at age six.... When my life started to fall apart. We were a more secluded family back then. I mean its not like we had any neighbors living in the middle of the woods. The nearest city was about 20 miles away. So me and my brothers were homeschooled. I was six when my mother was killed.

I was more observant then most 6 year olds. My dad's job took him to the city, just because we lived far away from any civilization didn't mean we didn't need money. He came back one night. He looked scared.... He was pale and very quiet. Not even mom could coax what was wrong out of him. He just kept saying he was fine and to mind our own damn business. We knew something was wrong, my father rarely ever swore.

As the months went on he only got worst. Started getting sick, coughing up blood. He would mumble to himself. Then it happened. It was the middle of the night when I heard my mother scream.... Her scream haunts me to this day. I was the first one in the room. My mother .... She.... Was gone. All that was left was her arm. My father sat huddled in the corner of the room in a puddle of blood that wasn't his. Cradling the arm mumbling to himself incoherently. When the police arrived they took my father into custody. They convicted him of murdering her. He kept insisting that he would never hurt his wife. That HE had took her. When they would ask what he meant by HE. He would elaborate by saying HIM. They asked for a description. He said it had been a tall faceless business man. That was the last nail in the coffin.

The police sentenced him to the electric chair. He was scheduled to die in one month. He broke out of prison half way through that month. No one knew how he did it. The security guards simply passed out. He showed up that same day at our front door. He was rambling about how was going to see mom and we could join them. How we could be a family again. That day he walked off into the woods alone. The police searched the forest for 3 days before they found him dead holding the dead corpse or what was left of it of my mother.

The police reasoned he had just offed himself because of the guilt from what he had done. I've hated my father ever since. There was never any doubt in my mind that my father murdered her. But now I see the the truth.

IT WAS HIM THAT DANM TENTACLE BASTARD HE DID IT HE BROKE APART FAMILY IT'S BEEN HIM RUINING MY LIFE THE VERY BEGINNING! IT'S ALWAYS BEEN HIM.... ALWAYS....always.....been..him.

Damn it now I'm crying.

This wasn't the end either. This was just the beginning ill post the rest later after I've calmed down.

I just can't think about this anymore.

The cold boy and other creepy ass children.

Really! What the hell. What do I do to attract these fears? I'm not a generally fearful person! Smiley I get, I got in the way of him retrieving his prey. But what about the damn cold boy?

Okay so we took a trip to the mall. It was going good(well for Laura.... She kept dragging me in girly stores). It felt nice..... Almost normal. There was one incident but I'm not sure it was fear related just really creepy. After a bunch of girly stores I finally refused to go in one. So she went in alone. I was waiting outside the store just sitting on a bench. I saw this girl walk by she couldn't have been a day over 19. Yet she had this little girl with her. This little girl was really creepy I mean something was just off about her. Her face just seemed wrong. The little girl turned and looked at me. I shivered.

Anyways after we were finished and Laura had a ridiculous amount of bags.... We loaded them up into the car and then I noticed the temperature rapidly dropping. Then I heard it...

"Mary Mary quite contrary,
How does your garden grow?
With silver bells and cockleshells
And pretty maids all in a row."

It was a boy with skin that cracked as he moved. I instantly knew this was the cold boy. We jumped in the car and Laura started the car. She handed me a gun I don't remember her having. I reached out the window shooting at the cold boy. I've never been a good shot like Nick but we weren't to far away. I shattered the cold boys head with ease. We got away but not without my entire left arm being frozen. Even then I knew he was letting us get away. I'm typing this with my right hand only.

It's extremely annoying, damn cold boy.

I don't get it. What did I do to gather the attention of the cold boy? I'm also pretty sure that girl wasn't fear related but I could be wrong though. She was creepy as hell.

Oh and even though this wasn't the black dog or EAT, I still blame you Wolf.

What?

Couldn't fall asleep last night. I stayed up all last night watching this channel called tower TV. Pretty cool channel. Had one of my favorite shows as a child Candle Cove. Always watched this show when I was younger. There was also some goosebumps episodes I don't remember airing. They were pretty cool to.

When I got up to get a glass of water I noticed a letter from the cable company on the counter. It informed the family that there cable was being turned off. It was dated a week ago. So I walked back in to the living room and turned off the TV.

This is kinda disturbing. I'm probably not going to watch anymore TV.

Well Laura just yelled at me to get in the shower because she wouldn't be seen in public with someone who smelled like a hobo. Hmmm I should probably get a haircut while we're out.

Laura confuses me

So we sat down and talked about a few things. I told her why I had attempted to murder her. I told her that at any minute that I could snap and try to again. I told her I would understand if she didn't want to travel with me anymore.

After I told her this she gave me a look that said 'are you retarded'. She told me that of course she would stay with me. She said: "you surprised me today that's why you almost got me. Next time you let him take over ill knock you on your ass myself. Ill beat your ass until you snap out of it." That surprised me. She's always seemed so fragile. Oh she also said that she felt safer with the guy who "had the balls to head butt the slenderman" around. That made me chuckle.

We decided not to open the door in fear of ending up in the empty city. In fear! See what I did there? Hehe.

Anyways we found where the family keeps a portion of there money. About 1000 dollars. We're going to take it. I feel bad about it but were running low on funds. Laura also told me were going to the mall tomorrow. I didn't tell her no cause she kinda scares me now.

Let it be known that slender had no wrath that can compare to the wrath of an angry women.

Anyways goodnight everybody! Have wonderful non fear filled dreams.

Problems and the door

I almost killed her again. He just has so much influence. We were sparring in the back yard using wooden training swords. Turns out she's a better swordsman then I am.

But it seemed like his song amplified during combat. I blacked out during the fight and woke up on top of her hands around her neck. I stopped myself right before she suffocated. Me and her going to have a serious talk about the situation. Then I'll see if she still wants to travel with me. Because she's been avoiding me since.

In other news my search for a way to repress his influence has been fruitless so far. But I actually haven't had any run ins with smiley. So that's good or not I haven't decided yet.

Another disturbing thing that happened today. Not sure how to explain this. When Laura was in the basement looking for things we could use she found a door. It's just a large plain looking door. But I've been in that basement like 14 times and that door was not there before. So it just seemingly appeared there.

Haven't decided if we should open it or not. It gives me a bad feeling.

Dreams and plans

I woke up moments ago. I had to go to the bathroom. After I had finished I went to wash my hands. What I saw in the mirror.... It was me but I had on a mask. All white, the only noticeable feature were the eye holes. I noticed Slendy appear behind me his tentacles slowly surrounding me. I screamed. I then woke up. Laura must be a really deep sleeper.

So the song is causing me nightmares. He thinks he can break me? Is this the best this bastard can do? Well Slendy bring it on. Hit me with your best shot! God I don't even like Pat Bentar.

The plan for tomorrow is to gather info. I'm going to try and find a way to repress HIS influence.

According to the calendar on this fridge the family will be back in 4 days.

We'll be leaving in 2 days. His song isn't hurting me anymore it's... Comforting and alluring. Which worries me.

Hallucinations

I... I almost left Laura. Back at the house. I almost killed her. HIS song is making it hard to think. I'm starting to lose it. Thinking maybe it would be easier just to give in. I mean she's going die anyway right? Better me than smiley right? I wouldn't be alone anymore. I would have a family again. How wonderful it would be.

No.....no.....no. C'mon Roy get a grip. That's Slendy talking not you.

Okay....okay. So I grabbed a book bag I found in the house this morning and filled it with my weapons and some supplies. I convinced myself it was safer for her if I just left. I was confronted as I left. As I was walking away this is what happened.

N: do you really think this is the solution?

I didn't have to turn around to know it was Nick.

R: It's all I can do.

N: do you think leaving will make her life safe? Slendy isn't the only one who's after her, you know that.

R: smiley wont touch her, slender will make sure of that. He wants me to do it myself. He won't let anyone else do it.

N: maybe.... But how long will that last? Slendy will only keep you around till he's bored with you. Then what will happen to her?

R: Laura's strong. She can take care of herself.

N: You'll last longer together. How long do you think you'll last? You can barely focus. Ritter has more control over you than you think.

R: I'm in control! Not that bastard!

N: your fighting a losing battle! Your fighting for control and he's winning. You know you won't last much longer at this rate.

R: I will win! I'm.... I'm in control....

N: look at you your losing it! You know you are. You know that this isn't the solution. You know running wont solve anything.

R: it's for the be-

N: you keep telling yourself that! It's for the best! For who though? Don't lie to yourself. Your running away at the first sign of trouble because your scared! Is that all you know how to do run? Your all talk! What was it you said to wolf? "in the end I might only play the fool and ill die a fools death. But I won't be a coward." That's all you are! Your nothing but a coward. There's a little bit of trouble and you run away tail in between your legs!

R: stop....

N: your afraid it will happen again! You haven't moved on!

R: please....

N: you think that my death is your fault! That Izzy was your fault!

R: stop it!

N: you don't want to stick around because your scared it will happen again! That she'll be killed or taken and there won't be a damn thing you can do about it!

R: JUST STOP!

N: hurts doesn't it? The truth always does. The truth that your nothing but a damn coward.

R: what do I do then!?

N: if your scared she'll be killed then don't let it happen! Get stronger! To protect her and yourself! Running is never a permanent solution Roy. So stop running and start fighting. But it's your choice in the end. I can't make this choice for you. I'm not even real after all. Which will you take Roy?

R: what?

N: which will you take? Path of needles or path of pins?

Even in death Nick kicks my ass when I need it.

I turned around and there was of course no one there. His song is loud as ever. But I will try to fight it. For her sake. Ill stay for now. I didn't like that my hallucination was quoting wolf... It was kind of creepy.

Oh there was one other thing I found rather disturbing. When I got back to the front door there was another bouquet. It was comprised entirely of black roses. This can't be good.

God I need a vacation.

I can't sleep

HIS song is so loud now.

It....it hurts.

It won't go away.

HE wants me to do something for him.

The more I resist the louder it gets.

But I won't....cant give in.

But god does it hurt.

Pressing forward

My head hurts so bad! But according to the doctor I don't have a concussion. Laura said she actually has a friend around these parts that wouldn't mind if we crashed at their house so were heading there now. So let me try my best to explain what happened last night.

We decided it would be safest if Nick and Laura stayed at the car. Actually scratch that I decided it would be safest. So armed with nothing but a dagger I took off into the forest. It was just as I had remembered it. Tall, dark, and ominous. Especially now that I knew what lurked in them. It took me around 2 hours to get to my house. My house is actually located in a small clearing at about the center of the forest.

When I saw my house it brought back a number of unsettling memories that I may or may not get into in the next post. It was rundown looking as though no one had set foot in it for years. Which I guess makes sense because I'm pretty sure nobody had. My house wasn't exactly large, it was more of a small cottage.

I knew HE was following. Slendy isn't exactly subtle. But I went up to my house any ways. I opened the door which looked ready to come off the hinges. The next thing I knew I heard "Suprise!" Right before something cracked me in the back of the skull. I blacked out at this point.

It's impossible to say how much time passed before I woke up. My vision was blurry at first. What I saw in front of me was... Utterly terrifying. We were in my living room. Izzy was to my right flipping the dagger I had brought with me. In front of me was Nick and Laura hanging upside down from the ceiling. At this point Izzy noticed I was awake. She gave me a wicked grin.

Than all of the sudden she got angry saying how mad she was that I had replaced her. She walked over to Laura and put the knife to her cheek drawing a small cut. Asking me 'what this bitch has that I don't!'. She calmed down. Laura looked really scared. I tried to get up and I noticed that my hands were bound behind me.

Izzy told me we were going to play a little "game". She told me I had exactly 10 seconds to choose which of my friends I wanted to see die. She started counting down. I couldn't choose to kill someone. I begged her not to do it. By the fifth second I was crying tears streaming down my cheeks I was on my knees begging. Saying if their was any of the old Izzy left in her the one I loved she wouldn't do it.

She simply gave off a cruel chuckle. She walked over to Nick saying she guessed she would have to kill them both. She put the dagger,my dagger, up to his throat. I was screaming for her to stop. It didn't matter she slit his throat blood shooting from his neck. All I could do was sit their and watch in horror. She said that it looked like daddy wanted my new girlfriend for himself. That's when I saw slender standing in the back of the room, his tentacles slowly wrapping around Laura. Laura was screaming.

Something inside of me snapped. Between seeing Nick die and this bastard trying to take someone else. I'd been bottling my emotions since Izzy disappeared. But this was my breaking point. What I felt at that moment could be only described as pure rage. I jumped to my feet, hands still bound. I bull rushed the bastard. One of its tentacles shot forward. Then this amazing thing happened....... I dodged around it. I felt this amazing burst of energy. Speed and strength I hadn't had before. His tentacles started shooting forward one by one and I just kept dodging until.... I tripped over my own feet.

He lifted me up and brought me close to his face like in our first encounter. But this time he touched my forehead to his. This song exploded in my head. I can't even describe it. All I knew is that it hurt. I needed it to stop! I did the only thing I could in the situation. I reared my head back and head butted slendy. He actually staggered(this may have been my imagination) and he almost seemed surprised? It felt like slamming your head on a block of steel. I thought head butting a proxy hurt this was about 100x worse.

Even though my head hurt terribly, it had the desired effect. He dropped me and Laura. I looked around and noticed flower petals in the air. This was bad sign and I knew it. I looked behind me and saw him for the first time. I don't remember much about his appearance other then the fact that he was smiling. I knew this was the smiling man. I checked if Laura was okay, once she assured me she was she unbound my hands and we got up and we ran.

I only looked back once and I saw smiley and slendy having a stare down. Slendy's tentacles were swaying angrily behind him, as if he was angry at smiley's appearance. We ran and ran all the way back to the car, not stopping once. Laura jumped in the drivers seat and we drove fast away. It was a miracle we weren't pulled over. When we got far enough away she stopped the car and pulled over. I went to ask her why she stopped when I saw her face. Her eyes were filled with tears and she looked so scared. I hugged her and she cried on my shoulder. Before I knew it I was crying to.

HIS song is still playing softly in the back of my head.

I can't mourn for Nick's death. I'm sure slendy isn't gracious enough to grant me a mourning period. So I must press forward.

I have to get stronger for Laura and for myself. It happened again because I was to weak. I don't know how I'll get stronger. I have no one to train me.

Ill have to find someone to train me, maybe another runner. We're at her friends house now so I'm going to take a nice long shower. God knows I need it.